How to do parenting in digital world?

Recently, I had a opportunity to attend an online workshop on "Better Digital Parenting" organized by CyberSafeKids. As parenting in the digital world, such as controlling smartphone usage for kids, is a significant concern for us, I decided to participate in this online event to gain further insights into the topic. It turned out to be a beneficial decision for me, and I would like to summarize the key takeaways here in case they are helpful for other parents.

I like the simple and neat principle mentioned at the beginning - "the same rules apply" - which refers to the idea that the same rules about parenting in offline world also apply to the online world.

If we think about it, it actually makes a lot of sense, as we would not allow our kids to be exposed to danger offline or have inappropriate conversations with strangers.  And the same rules should apply to the online world. 

Another alarming perspective arises when you allow your kids to access the online world; simultaneously, the online world gains access to your kids.

In addition to the principle, the panels also shared many useful tips for parents on how to control devices and apps for kids. With the age at which children acquire smartphones becoming younger, one panel mentioned that the average age is around 11-12, and even younger for exposure to apps, such as playing games on iPads. It is important to establish rules to keep kids safe while using devices and apps.

Tips

Check if an app or content is age-appropriate. This is straightforward, and as parents, we need to ensure that the apps and content to which our kids are exposed are suitable for their age. Usually, apps and online videos have age indicators.

Ensure you know what they are watching. In line with the above tip, we also need to have an idea of the kinds of content they are watching. For example, the age limit on YouTube Kids is based on a predefined range for each group, but there might still be some inappropriate content for your kids depending on their ages.

Use them in family spaces, not behind the door. This could be one way to stay aware of what they are watching. We don't need to watch everything with our kids, but having some awareness if they are watching in family spaces can be helpful.

Limit the time spent using those. For each age group, there are recommended time limits for using such devices. Additionally, excessive exposure to these contents, games, and devices can lead to addiction in children.

"Safe mode" enabled search. For example, Google's feature, SafeSearch, helps you manage explicit content in your search results, such as sexual activity and graphic violence.

Turn off the "auto feed" feature on YouTube. This feature is designed to allow us to keep watching with zero effort, and we all know it makes it hard for us to stop watching, and of course, even harder for our kids. I would also recommend to turn off the recommendations feature, simply don't let the algorithm decides what our kids to watch next.

Use parental controls on devices. This feature is available on almost any device nowadays, such as iPhone, Android phones, and Nintendo Switch, among others. It allows us to monitor the time spent on the device and set limits on which apps can be downloaded and installed.

Pair mode for Snapchat. The panels also mentioned that this mode can allow you to know who they are messaging.

No device in the bedroom, especially in the evening. We all know it will make it difficult for us to sleep, especially when we start watching something on them.

While applying these rules or guidelines is important, simultaneously, building a relationship where 'you are not going to be in trouble' between us and our kids is also crucial. We implement these measures to protect our kids, not to distance them from us.

Finally, to effectively enforce these rules at home, we must make a conscious effort to model behavior as parents. For example, no devices in the bedroom in the evening or during meal times.